Thank you for all prayers

Thank you dear friends, for all your prayers. Thank you good Lord, for your mercy and grace.

My grandma was rushed to hospital on Tuesday (17sep) after dinner, when she could neither sit or lay down due to excruciating pains in her abdomen. She was wheeled to ICU after doctor's assessment. Prior to this, she had been suffering from severe discomfort from time to time, most often after meals, which according to my mom was supposedly "an old person's ailment" - she was feel severe chills so bad her body ached, but would usually recover from the chills after covering herself with blanket and perspiring while she lays covered with blanket.

On Wednesday, she was in stable conditions. By wee hours of Thursday, her ability to breath was declining, so was her blood pressure. By dawn, doctor instructed to put her on full breathing aid. A check revealed she was bleeding in the stomach, plus another check (i'm not sure what's the timeline for this check, but both findings were made known to me on Thursday morning, when my mom called me to tell me to rush down to the hospital for a possible last time with grandma) saw that she had a gallstone block entirely the bile duct, and toxins had already accummulated in her pancreas. That was when we were all aware that her stomach issue had in fact been chronic pancreatitis, coupled with the bleeding souce in her stomach, i remember hearing "blood poisoning". She was in septic shock leading to breathing failure.

An urgent op was carried out to stop her stomach bleeding, drain the toxins and remove gallstone. A simple but high risk op, given that her blood pressure was dangerously low, she's over 85, and that they were doing the op guided by x-ray, they had no idea how much she has bled out internally. It was to be a half hour to 45min wait, but it took 1hr 30min before we finally see her wheeled out of the OT.

Post op, doctor told us they managed to stopped her bleeding, and planted a tube to bypass the gallstone to drain the toxins, which hopefully will be passed out by her own body. They were unable to extract the gallstone (root cause of all these complications) because her white blood cell count was so low, they are worried there's not enough to clot leading her to bleed out during op, and the gallstone is quite large in size.

From Thursday up till today, though still in critical condition in ICU, she has been showing progress in recovery and also in responding to us each day. First was stabilized vitals, then she's recovering partial voluntary breathing so doctor had her oxygen pipe downsized, sedative dose was lessened (they had to sedate her bcos she fought to remove the oxygen pipe initially), developed mild fever yesterday (a sign that her body is recovering the ability to fight the pancreas infection), and today recovering her blood pressure. We were told that if she continues with her current rate of recovery, the oxygen pipe can be expected to be removed in days to come.

Though its been only a span of 4 days since my first hospital visitation, it felt like i've been going there for months. Needless to mention what it must have felt for my mom and her siblings.

Though i've been through the loss of FIL, seen it all, been through it, it is not seeing her in tubes and not moving that makes me want to cry, it is when i speak to her, seeing how she struggles to get up or repositions herself due to the discomfort, and seeing her cry through the closed lids, it made me choke.

Though she is recovering at a good rate, i dare not hold my hopes too high, and fall too hard later. A lesson i've learnt.

Since the first hit with FIL years ago, i have been running a particular scene in my mind over and over, inception maybe, to be ready for the day when my grandma have to leave this world. I cannot bear to see her going, but it is inevitable. So i just keep prepping myself to hold up with the heartache and all. But when the possibility of such a day is here, no amount of mental prep previously done can do. It perhaps had hold me together and avoided emotional breakdown. Which i really needed because i had to attend to JCH. And thanks to the support and small messages from friends who knows because i had to cancel appointments. Thanks to LOF for supporting through prayers. Thank God for healing my grandma.

Please my dear friends, spend more time loving and visiting your old folks. Too much of their lives had already passed them by. Cherish the remaining times they have with you. Love them while you can. Also please take note of their health. To them, pain below the chest and above the butt = stomach ache. This i believe is why my grandma wasn't diagnosed promptly with her gallstone issue and led to other complications affecting her organs. Take note of your own health too. Read on pancreatitis. It is so unknown but can be so fatal.

Please, do continue praying for my grandma's recovery. And also for the wellbeing of my family members: my brothers, cousins, mom and her siblings who visit everyday. Even for me, by visiting one hour max a day (skipped Sat's visitation for Meilin's farewell as she's going to be in UK for the next 2yrs at least), i'm feeling tired. Emotionally tired i guess. Physically maybe, having to brave the sun pushing JCH to take the train to the hospital. Thankfully JCH has been quite coorperative. Feel so sorry that i have not been able to read to him or play much with him for these few days.

Take care. Good night.

Haenim Playzone!

We've collected the play yard from Kiddy Palace! Its a standard set, plus 2 extension wall pieces, and is without music. They are out of the music play yard and don't have news of when the new shipment would come in. We took away 2 connectors due to space constrain and tied the middle gate pieces together, and its a decent playing area for JCH now!

FYI parents who would consider buying this, Kiddy Palace offers it in:

- Colors: Beige/green and Blue/red
- With or without music (in both the above colors)
- Extension: Wall extension and Door extension

Of cos their play yard set doesn't include the abc playmat (playmat from Toys R Us @ $50).

It is possible to order by calling and to arrange for self-collection or delivery (free with purchases amounting $250 and above). We bought ours for $139+$(49.90*2). So do the math, i'm lazy now. XP Always check with them for their current prices. We did self-collect and its a hassle. Bleah.

The play yard is quite sturdy on its own when connected together. Plus the suction pads at the bottom of the pieces (2 suction pads per piece), the play yard doesn't move around. Afterall, this isn't fixed to a wall so don't expect it to support an adult or even child leaning fully on it.

Hope this helps any parents out there looking to buy.

Pictures will follow tomorrow.

hello there dusts and cobwebs!

Its been a long time since the last entry, like 2 to 3wks already? And the main reason for my lack of post: RUNNING MAN!! For the past nights, hubby and I have been playing catch up on this variety show, sometimes 3 episodes per night. So, totally not in the mood to type post. Each time I watch and try to type something, by the time I reach like the end of first sentence, my mind is all on the show already, forgetting what I had intended to type immediately. So highly addictive. The addiction is further fuelled when we bought the mini HDMI wire to connect our tablet to the TV in the living room. Watching in the room is difficult for us, we can't laugh because it will wake JCH up.

Initially, I had the stamina to watch through the night. As the days passed, plus the drowsy medicine that I have to take, it soon became that I would nap in the afternoon with JCH, and then play catch up with the cleaning up and show watching at night. There's like hyper a lot of cleaning to do for this moment. Because of the rearranging of cabinets items and spaces throughout the house prior to this period of Running Man, I could move chunks of equipment from our cramped up room to spaces in the living room and kitchen. *and then now I'm singing to Spice Girls on Class95..ok back focus back!* Almost all are equipment used for preparation of JCH's food and his toys. So, wiping down of cabinets, arranging and rearranging of cabinets. Plus we disposed some old furnitures and bought new ones so that a space could be freed up for JCH's play yard. So you know what comes with new furnitures. Washing and house cleaning.

THEN, there's buying of more toys for JCH! And no, those are not like, impulse buying, they are all planned buys. See, JCH started out with really minimum toys for him to fiddle and occupy his attention. And story books too, I've just started buying when he passed 7mths. When there are new acquisition (of JCH's equipment), there follows a regime of thorough washing down and sterilizing process before JCH can lay his hands on the toys. More washing! Plus JCH is getting more cereals and porridge now, more more more washing. Anyone who cooks knows that the preparation process is the most tedious process, and I'm having double the tedious things going on as I bulk prepare the ingredients for cooking. Why? I hope that JCH will be able to enjoy variety in his eating process, and not only have sweet potatoes for like one week. =X I would be pissed if that happened to me. Hahaha.

At the end of all the busy-ness, endless washing, I felt like its all worth me spinning around, and having my days and nights reversed. He's now taking homemade (white rice) cereal spiced up by carrots, apples, nectarines and (coming up) brown rice, barley, green bean cereals in addition to the commercial yoghurt cereal (I have no idea how to prepare yoghurt cereal.. >.<), homemade (jasmine rice) porridge with carrots, potatoes, sweet potatoes, pumpkin, ikan bilis, egg yolks, (coming up) radish, chicken and asparagus, and not forgetting bananacado puree. Oatmeal in the pipeline. Also seeing how he has grown now (in terms of size, motor development, mind development): putting on healthy weight, showing good appetite in semi-solids, taking good naps and good night sleeps, having very keen interest to interact with people, singing along when being sung to, watching Pororo, interest in being read to and fixated at the books, seems like learning to use his hands to feel our faces and materials, very keen interest in eating almost anything too, and continuous effect in trying to crawl. No matter how tired out I feel, down, lonely, sick, every night I get lifted up by looking at his sleeping face. Also these days he's been really sweet. When on his tummy, he will turn and smile in my direction when I talk to him, and turn towards me (he is super proficient in turning now) till he knocks into me, and just lies on me any how and flash that smile. He does this to his dad too.

Alright, time to sleep now. Gonna update tomorrow onwards with pictures. Have like a lot of photos in my phone now, but didn't upload anywhere. Just been too occupied with JCH, especially now his attention needs to be filled in with activities to excite that small little growing mind.

Looking forward to the arrival of the play yard, and it will be time to put up the finishes that will help to keep the baby mind entertained while mommy gets busy either with stuff, or rest. XD Oh and busy with looking for new recipes for this growing eater! Nomnomnomnom!